Three-Quarters of the Way to Heaven

Photo courtesy of www.freefoto.com

One of the Christian concepts that has always fascinated me is Heaven.  I've fantasized throughout my life about what Heaven would be like.  Of course it would have all the people and things that I like, and none that I don't.  That's a given.  But lately I've been reading a lot about personal happiness.  I've decided that, since this is my only chance, I want to create my own heaven right here right now.  Is it possible?  Well, not according to the criteria I set above.  But I can come close:

• I can surround myself with people I like and cut loose those I don't like. Whenever possible.
• I can watch whatever movies I want.
• I can learn to love myself, forgive myself and be patient with myself.
• I can keep my house as neat and clean as I want.  Or not.
• I can gain satisfaction from helping others.
• I can choose not to wear makeup and a bra.
• I can work towards financial goals that will help me achieve my heaven-on-earth, like saving money to buy a small farm where I can have more animals and a bigger garden.
• I can run around barefoot even if my heels crack and dirt gets under my toenails.
• I can let go of past failures that cause me pain today.
• I can love thunderstorms even if people think that's weird.
• I can make amends to those I've hurt in the past and find peace knowing I tried even if I'm not forgiven.
• I can wear socks with sandals.
• I can accept my disability and be comforted by the knowledge that I'm doing everything in my power to get better.
• I can spoil my animals rotten.
• I can practice random acts of kindness, and learn to accept kindness in return.
• I can eat junk at the fair and ride the rides 'til I puke (though I've only puked once).
• I can forgive those who have hurt me and let go of that pain.
• I can act a fool in Walmart, playing with the toys and riding the shopping cart to my car.
• I can do things that will make the world a better place even if only in small ways, such as going "green", getting involved in my community and keeping a sharp eye on the government (and making my voice heard).
• I can eat chocolate.  In moderation.
• I can contribute to causes and charities I deem worthy, whether it be by financial contributions or donating my time.
• I can cook fabulous meals.  Or not.
• And finally, I can love my husband with my heart, body, soul and mind.  And be loved in return.

According to that last criteria, I'm three-quarters of the way to Heaven already.  

It's Not My Fault!

I don't usually rant. I normally try to stay somewhere between cheerful and chirpy as much as to not annoy my husband as to hide my real state of mind. But sometimes something gets under my skin and I have to write about it. I hope you'll get something from this, even if it's just thought-provoking.

I admit that I've sometimes had trouble owning up to my mistakes. But when it comes to the real things, the things of importance, I will face the music. I confess, apologize as needed, and most importantly I admit that in some way that I was at fault for whatever the problem was.

It amazes me how many people today won't take responsibility for their actions. Take my only child, for example. He's 24 and should know better, but everything from being fired from a job because of absenteeism and tardiness to his recent D.U.I. are all "Not My Fault." In his mind he literally has no responsibility for any of it. He was a victim of circumstance, malice, or any of a hundred other absolutions he imagines. So many people, especially our kids, blame others consistently for the consequences of their own actions. "Not My Fault" echoes across America.

It's a social cancer. It started when kids were allowed to escape the consequences of their actions. When we stopped punishing our children for doing things they knew they shouldn't do. When we accepted lame excuses for poor performance, for irresponsibility. When we parents started letting them get away with blaming their problems on something other than their own actions. Those kids grew up and passed it on to their kids. And there's only one way to stop it.

Ask yourself if you're accepting responsibility for your own behavior. If you're not, your kids won't either. The next time you want to blame your situation on someone else, ask yourself if you did something to put yourself there. Remember that the hard road is admitting you put yourself there; the easy road is lying to yourself and blaming somebody else. Both roads have consequences just like everything else in life.

The easy road lets you tell yourself you didn't do anything wrong, you didn't fail at something, you didn't make a mistake. You're just a victim of life, it's not your fault. This kind of thinking lets you be lazy, it relieves you of having to learn to overcome obstacles. Do you really want to live your life as a victim? Helpless and unable to better yourself and your situation in life? I'll bet the answer is no.

Just once take the hard road and accept responsibility for your own actions. It's painful for a little while but your conscience will be clear and more importantly, you'll be in charge of your life. You won't be a victim any more.